I’ve decided

With or without you by my side

I will keep living I will be breathing

and so I’ve decided to move-on

and keep on moving-on…

Broken heart disease

There is a big chance I will die of a broken heart disease

a disease where a licensed medical professional is not able to cure.

It is not pneumonia or hypertension… is just is a disease of a heart

that has been broken into fragments. It is a poet’s nightmare because

it is not easy to write or to capture in words. It is not contagious

because the disease is personalized to every victim. I hope I find cure

before I succumb to it.

I seek asylum from myself

often hiding behind my poetry.

Desperately holding on to

the jagged edge

of my fragmented heart.

Constantly finding the strength to write wholeheartedly without fear of exposing every corner of my heart. -justme62

Here I go again, swimming in my own tears

an overflowing river of self-loathing, self-pity

and all mixed-up of twisted feelings.

It’s a lonely river… a roller-coaster ride

to & from hell.

I’ve been on this river before and so I am familiar

with it’s twists and turns. I always tell myself to buckle up

because I don’t see myself getting out of this river anytime soon.

We often stumble and fall trying to find the true meaning of love. We look for it in books, we look for it in papers, we struggle to find the write words to say it or even the right words to say to the one we love.

We count on others to show us how to love, to open up their heart to us or even to give us the slightest clue that we are also loved and accepted by that particular person that make our heart skip a beat or two. We often wonder whether to believe the other person when they say the words ” I love you” to us. A whole lot of us, take a step back and get a stinging shock wave running through our head.

Because we can’t believe it that this person said those words, and often times we even distrust the other person. I really think there are many of us learned to be closed-up having our hearts locked-up in our chest that it sometimes can not feel or sense signal from the other person. We locked up our heart for fear of rejection for fear of getting it broken once more.

And often, we wonder around not knowing where to go, how to take this and we often wonder where we are going to find Love, The kind of love we struggled to find and often times we tell ourselves that maybe…maybe we are destined to be alone.